Saturday, January 24, 2015

Wintergreen Summer

"Summer and Winter" by Macarhign and displayed on Pxleyes.com 
Snow falls gracefully
Upon the wet and cold ground
A winter wonder
Land of the fallen angels
All unique marionettes

Dancing in the summer rain
Between the blues and greens

The gray sky fills up
Like an older photograph
White flashes, small ones
Capturing the black lens flare
In the background of pine trees

Dancing in the summer rain
Between the blues and greens

Silk sheets cover us
In ashes of joyful lace
Washing us in cold
But the warmth is what we sow
In a winter wonderland

Dancing in the summer rain
Between the blues and greens


I wanted to create a new kind of poetic form, and so I found that the Ballade and Tanka forms would be perfect for this experiment. There are three stanzas of five lines with three couplets in this poem. The three main stanzas are written in traditional Tanka style, while the couplets are an addition to complete the seven line minimum requirement for a Ballade. Each of the couplets are styled and flavored in the traditional ballade one line refrain, except that I modified the refrain to be a repetitive two liner. Please let me know what you all think about this. I would enjoy your feedback. 


14 comments:

  1. Kenn, I like your form. Your repeating couplets work very well. I like to work with repetition too. I think it is a very effective way of making a point. I also like the idea of sowing warmth in a winter wonderland.

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    1. Thanks Mary, I'm glad that the form worked out for you. It can get a little difficult when trying to create something new.

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  2. It's a beautifully flowing poem...the image of the photograph captured me...as if we were delving in it and brining it to life

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    1. Good that the poem flowed well with the photograph. I was hoping that the symmetry was there.

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  3. This could fit our weather lately. Great movement.

    Thanks for coming by to visit.

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    1. Yes, it has been cold and hot on and off all winter. Crazy weather, can't seem to make up its mind apparently.

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  4. Kenn I really enjoyed the flow of this as well as we moved between 2 worlds...great image too

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    1. When I chose this picture I knew it matched the poem perfectly because where I live the winter can be exactly like this.

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  5. sowing warmth in a cold land - that sounds like a good thing to do... a beautiful metaphor here

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    1. It is definitely a wishful thought that is most desired during a cold night.

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  6. Lovely. Once again, I've enjoyed the form you've struck upon. Your poetry is very visual - thus, I think, the old photograph reference . . . perfect!

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    1. I used the old photograph reference because it takes a keen eye to spot the details back in the day. The eye is the greatest camera ever known. Or so my photography teacher said.

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  7. Silk sheets cover us
    In ashes of joyful lace ... very cool Kenn

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All comments would be appreciated.